Shrek makes infinitely more sense if you ascribe to the theory that everyone is a PC in an RPG, and Donkey’s player managed to avoid a boss battle by rolling a nat 20 to seduce the fucking dragon
“I want to be a half-ogre.”
“What? You can’t. They’ve seen your picture, and you’re a human.”
“The ogre half is at night.”
“Ok, now it’s time for the boss fight against Farquaad.”
“I have my dragon girlfriend eat Farquaad.”
“…you what?”
“I have my dragon girlfriend-”
“No, no, I heard you the first time. Look, I’m gonna roll a d20 and if it’s a 20 then the dragon will eat Farquaad.” -dice sounds-
*pinches the bridge of his nose* “Ok, so the boss is fucking dead now.”
By Shrek 2, everything has just gone to shit.
“Okay, so I go in as sexy human Shrek, riding on the shoulder of the giant gingerbread man, and pull down the drawbridge of the castle so I can slip in and crash the fairy god mother’s performance of I Need A Hero. Do I need to roll Endurance to survive boiling milk?”
*DM covers their face with both hands, sobbing* “What the fuck have you assholes done to my campaign!?”
Donkey is the bard who seemingly forgot that their spells require a free hand to cast.
Puss In Boots is the rogue who put all of his points into charisma, probably bribed the DM into letting him be bipedal. Donkey’s player won’t let it go.
I hate when cartoons have a kid and the kid is a clone of one parent
Bonus points if the boy looks exactly like his father and the girl looks exactly like her mother
Double points if by all accounts that the parents are so physical different from one another that their children looking like the parent of the same sex should not be possible
I love this movie but yo every time I watch this scene I get mad
Not gonna lie I actually had PJ and Pistol from good troop in mind when responding to you , Treasure planet didn’t even cross my mind
I honestly didn’t remember this problem in that show since I haven’t seen it since I was a kid and
Wow
To be truthful my thoughts went immediately to Scamp from Lady and the Tramp 2
It even has that same 3 sisters and 1 brother thing that Treasure Planet had
WTF Disney?!?!
This one is the funniest to me because it’s the most mentioned in the tags and I even hated seeing the pups as a kid and it’s just that one example that didn’t need to be mentioned but Should’ve because EVERY Person our age range saw these movies and we all thought the exact same thing
the grass in the original shrek movie is not grass. its hair. they used hair textures for the grass bc the actual grass for some reason in their computer modelling programs would not behave like grass so they used hair textures colored green.
elvis presley was a registered DEA officer who asked nixon for the title and was awarded it.
What else?
the great escape artist houdini was living in a time period where mysticism, fortune telling, ouija boards, seances and etc were becoming very common place and trendy. and he fucking hated it so much. so much that he would go to seances in disguise and make some bullshit off the wall shit like “my son died last year can you let me talk to him” and the seance person would be like ‘THIS IS YOUR SON HELLO FATHER’ then he’d rip off his disguise and be like YOU FRAUD I HAVE NO CHILDREN.
He died on Halloween night in detroit and as far as i know every year they hold seances on halloween trying to get in contact with his spirit. If seances work i bet his ghost is just pissed off and not responding out of raw spite.
foxes cant snarl like dogs and wolves cus the muscles in their muzzle dont allowe it so they just drop their jaws and scream.
Molly's Monsters 