i hate “accurate” shakespeare productions where all the actors are white guys. the reason women didn’t act in his plays was because it was illegal in that time obv due to misogyny, and we don’t want that to carry over. there were characters of colour that shakespeare specifically wrote. for example, othello was a part for a black actor and yet there r MODERN productions of othello where othello’s actor is a white dude in blackface.
shakespeare would be thrilled if he knew that modern productions of his works featured diverse casts, complete with not only female actors, lgbt actors, and actors of colour, but interpretations that have been tweaked to showcase modern issues that black communities, gay people, women, etc. face.
if you want to do something, do it. a midsummer production where they’re all lesbians? a romeo and juliet production depicting racial tensions? a twelfth night production where viola is and is played by a trans women? shakespeare’s ghost will give u a thumbs up. (plus his works are out of copyright so u can do whatever the hell you want with them whether he’d want you to or not.)
Would the Takarazuka all female theater be enough? Cause they pretty much do ANYTHING especialy Shakespeare:
Romeo & juliet:
Hamlet:
Puck (Midsummer Night’s Dream):
Rome at Dawn (Julius Caesar):
The two noble Kinsmen:
Shakespeare:
STOP ACTIVATING MY GAY I BEG YOU
Bi panic!
I NEED THIS IN MY LIFE IMMEDIATELY
GAY UPDATE: JUST GOT GAYER
I got to see the Takarazuka while I was in Japan. Be jealous. It was wonderful.
A Midsummer Night’s Dream: Fairy divorce court causes everything in the vicinity to go to hell, briefly.
A Comedy of Errors: Don’t give your twins the same name. Seriously don’t.
As You Like It: No one actually likes anything that is occurring. Especially not Jaques.
Twelfth Night: Local pageboy causes everyone to catch Gay Feelings. Also multiple shipwrecks.
Much Ado About Nothing: Random bastard decides to cause problems for literally no reason other than because he is a dick.
Two Gentlemen of Verona: One gentleman is not actually a gentleman, he’s a grade-A turdwaffle.
Love’s Labors Lost: Four friends’ attempts to swear off love go about as well as you would expect
The Merry Wives of Winsor: SO I HEAR U LIKE FALSTAFF??
The Taming of the Shrew: Sometimes the best cure for a mean wife is just straight-up sexism. (Actually no wtf why)
All’s Well That Ends Well: Nothing is well and it ends kinda shittily, too.
The Merchant of Venice: Apparently the entire population of Venice is either dumb, shitty, or Portia. Or Jessica.
Measure for Measure: Undercover Boss: Vienna Edition
Richard II: Local king forced to actually face consequences for his actions. Doesn’t like it much.
Henry IV part 1: TURN DOWN FOR WHAT interluded by existential kingly guilt. Also Hotspur
Henry IV part 2: The boring part because no Hotspur and no TURN DOWN FOR WHAT. Just guilt and guys with stupid names.
Henry V: Fun manly bonding as France gets fucked over
Henry VI part 1: Let’s Screw France Part 2 feat. Joan of Arc
Henry VI part 2: A bunch of murders and Everything Has Gone to Shit Now nice job breaking it, Henry.
Henry VI, part 3: YORK YORK YORK YORK also a bunch of murders, part 2.
Richard III: Once there was a Duke of Gloucester. He was so ugly that everyone died. The End
Henry VIII: You’d think think the betrayal of a queen and befuckening of the church would be really non-boring but you would be wrong
King John: No one knows what’s happening. Not me, not you, certainly not Johnny. I guess an entire king dies or something idk
Romeo and Juliet: Local teenage fling ends in six deaths and a banishment. Authorities are baffled
Macbeth: If you don’t sleep you become a murderer I don’t make the rules also if witches are nearby… you’re fucked.
Hamlet: Danish prince should have just called Ghostbusters
Othello: And you thought your racist coworker was a pain in the ass
King Lear: Local shitty dad amazed that all his kids turned out shitty. How could this happen.
Julius Caesar: Fun male bonding exercise devolves into civil war and multiple accounts of suicide
Antony and Cleopatra: Two-year fling devolves into civil war and multiple accounts of suicide
Coriolanus: Local war devolves into civil war and – just kidding it’s actually about Coriolanus ruining everything by being unable to shut his piehole for two seconds
Timon of Athens: Don’t Have Friends: A Cautionary Tale
Titus Andronicus: Blood, death, murder, death, human sacrifice, rape, death, dismemberment, cannibalism, death, and a partridge in a pear tree
Troilus and Cressida: Title characters are actually the most boring part of the play
Pericles: It’s like a fairy tale except less magic and more nonsense. And brothels I guess idk
Cymbeline: Twenty three different plot lines and none of them go anywhere
The Winter’s Tale: Local asshole king fucks with nature so NATURE FUCKS RIGHT BACK
The Tempest: The heartwarming tale of a wizard, his weird magical bird slave, his daughter, a drunk fish guy, some murderers, and a whole lot of wood gathering
Beatrice and Benedict are same-sex leaning disaster bisexuals who are both extremely surprised when they end up falling for someone of the opposite sex.
Any Shakespeare play, but put the camera tripod on top of a roomba and nudge it gently at roomba-speed along the arrow lines and the cast has to keep moving so as to keep pace with the camera. If you’re in the middle of a scene and get interrupted by a wall into the next new apartment you gotta figure out how to roll with it.
Also you gotta USE the furniture. You’re fiercely posturing at an enemy, and you’re in one of the little apartments? You’re having that argument in the bed. Murder the king in the shower. Balcony scene, Juliet’s on a coffee table. Don’t even for a second act like any of this is the slightest bit abnormal.
the most important thing to know about the plot of hamlet is that it’s so convoluted that the main character is kidnapped by pirates and it’s not even really a major plot point
Y’all can keep at it with that “Romeo and Juliet fell in love in five days how immature” shiz but Macbeth went from no murder to yes murder in like one afternoon and I feel like one of those is a significantly bigger problem than the other
Molly's Monsters 